Friday, May 29, 2009

Experiencing The Book of Judith

I am writing this in response to several reviews of the play “The Book of Judith”. These reviews were published during the first week of the play’s run in the revival tent at 1001 Queen St. W. One review was on the CBC’s National Friday May 22, created by Sandra Abma. Other’s were published in Eye Magazine, Eye Weekly, National Post and more.

And then there are the members of the audiences who have been commenting and e-mailing in numbers at every performance. And the choir.

I cannot be objective. This play – my play? – has been and continues to be a wonderful, terrifying and funny journey, all at once. None of the reviews, even the ones like the National which took a real stab at doing more than simply describing the basics, have not come anywhere near the actual experience of creating, then living, The Book of Judith.

I am most surprised and moved by the stories that choir members have shared with me. Most members are volunteers who have been labelled with a “disability”. Throughout the performance they are the Greek chorus: speaking my words, directing the audience, supporting Rubenfeld’s character’s transformation. One by one, as they grew into their role, many choir members have told me tales of how this play is supporting their own transformation, deepening a personal sense of power, liberating sexuality, strengthening vision and dream.

This effect among cast members is in many ways an unexpected treasure for me. I have given my life to breaking open the cage that the myth of disabled and normal confines people in. Yet in this play, in this nearly messianic, religious revival, interactive and spoofy over-the-top musical, the cage is utterly evapourated!

Don’t get me wrong – audiences are being deeply moved as well. The journey is far from smooth. People are personally engaged – with each other as well as with the cast. Andrew Penner wrote original music for the play. His tunes are like a spider’s web. With Rubenfeld’s energy, Penner’s melodic seduction and the choir’s invitation there is no escaping the joy, annoyance and struggle of the engagement. Although some have complained, many are returning for a second experience, and several have spoken or written to me, Michael Rubenfeld, Sarah G. Stanley, Alex Bulmer, Andrew Penner and other cast members about how they were deeply connected and changed in the performance.

The Book of Judith is a miracle disguised as a play about miracles.

Judith

Friday, May 22, 2009

The Book of Judith

Well, I am deeply immersed in the play: “The Book of Judith.” I wouldn’t have thought that the play and World Peace through Inclusion were related a mere three weeks ago. Now I understand that they truly are and so I am reporting on the play and my experience of it in this blog. Anyone who might have a chance to come and see the play in Toronto will really, really get something out of it, so don’t miss your chance!

“The Book of Judith” has mainly been created by Michael Rubenfeld and Sarah Stanley. A subtext of the play is about my part in their co-creation, a part which seemed to end about April of 2008. It was at this point that I got sick and tired the advocacy flavour of the piece. I was also beginning to have serious thoughts about taking on World Peace through Inclusion as my main focus at that time, although it was several months before I would meet Gabor and we begin serious consideration about taking off for six months.

Some of you know how deeply I struggle with the concept of advocacy even though I am often thought of as an advocate. The root of the idea is to speak for someone else. It contains within it the ever present idea that people who are considered to be disabled require other people’s help in order to function as human beings. It is not so much that we need advocates, as we need listeners, since even those who have no voice are very good at communicating and even better at contributing. Given that, it is no great task to discover what their dreams are and to create ways for them to contribute even more fully in society. We do not need to advocate; we need to pay attention.

So I was burnt out, disgusted, and unwillingly to spend the time and energy it would take – or at least, so it seemed – to shift Michael and Sarah’s focus. In this play Michael reads the email where I clearly told him and Sarah that I was out of the picture.

Last January, when I had to come back to Toronto so that issues around the funding of my personal assistance could be resolved, I went to a reading of the play which at that time had minimal structure and was being formed as a musical with Alex Bulmar as choir leader and Andrew Penner as composer. It was evident that Michael, and no doubt along with him Sarah, had taken a major shift in focus, and that in fact Michael was prepared to express a vulnerable and moving shift in his understanding of me personally and the life experience of people who get excluded by being labeled.

Those who get to know this play will understand that I was conflicted at that moment. On the one hand it would require me to allow myself to be exposed and in some ways, deified, so that the play could be formed. In other words, every view that other people have of me would become fully expressed in public – odd, inspirational, wrongheaded, bullheaded, artistic, curtly articulate, and more. It was no small struggle to agree to have these images boldly displayed.

At the same time, Michael himself takes a personal beating in terms of his ego and reputation. I realized that he is not putting me through this wringer as some kind of sacrificial lamb to a great cause, but he and Sarah have uncovered a brilliant format to create the context that could blow all the stereotypes to the wind.
I agreed with some reluctance to participate in “The Book of Judith” and justified it to myself as necessary to make up for the fact that I had abandoned Michael and Sarah at a critical stage in their process and that I owed it to them, particularly Michael who had put so much of himself into creating our group in the first place. I came to the rehearsals with that attitude.

Two or three days into the rehearsals I began to realize the genius of the structure of the play. A few more days and I awakened to the brilliance of having it be a musical with a choir made up of volunteer men and women, many of them people with disability labels themselves. They are at times my voice and at times Michael’s voice and very much the voice of people whose voice and social presence is erased by the societal oppression we call disability. At times there are some very humourous moments where the choir affirms the amazing possibilities that lie within the personal experience of being someone whose abilities are considered “wrong”.

And so now I am having a bit of fun with the whole thing. I have also had a wonderful opportunity to meet many of the choir members on a personal level and have some moments of deep reflection on our common journey.

Perhaps the greatest learning for me has been how much I was, and probably still am, caught up in the mirage of disability. This play could never have come to be being if I had not thought that my current singleness was the “fault” of my being quadriplegic. I started and fuelled the entire cascade of errors and events by believing that it is my stillness that places an obstacle between myself and potential lovers, and not just the reality of my being busy, somewhat solitary, and Britishly inhibited! It’s an amazing thing to have a play open your eyes to your own foolishness.

But back to World Peace through Inclusion. “The Book of Judith” is an on-the-ground (or on-the-stage) exposition of the contributions that people can make when they are included. It is also a full exploration of the journey that it takes for people to go from seeing each other as strangers to having collegial and intimate relationships. It’s a full expression of how peace is created when people take on the struggle to work from diversity instead of from sameness. I will never have a better example of what I have been talking about than this play.

We are very much hoping to tour the show. Anybody who has some ideas about this, please let me know.

By the way it has been a long time since I told anybody how to get in touch with us and/or the World Peace through Inclusion Foundation. My email is: avalanche0809@gmail.com and my phone # is: 647-232-9344. Gabor Podor is at gaborpodor@gmail.com.

Videos and information about “The Book of Judith” can be found at: www.bookofjudithplay.blogspot.com. Enjoy!
Judith

Friday, May 8, 2009

A New Phase Has Begun

(Written May 6, 2009)

As I am writing this I am waiting and wondering if the extremely intermittent internet service characteristic of Camphill Nottawasaga will come back on. It may be a day or two before I get to post this blog entry. I am sitting at my wall hung desk in the back of Avalanche, looking out at a pair of Camphill residents returning from work in the garden. It is nearly the exact experience from the days before Gabor and I left on the World Peace through Inclusion Tour during the week of Oct. 24, 2008 – a book end in time.

The World Peace through Inclusion Tour is finished. Well over but not entirely as there are bills to pay still. Essentially everyone involved has moved into a different mood and activity. Gabor will leave tomorrow to take up intensive preparation for the summer solstice festival, and to rest from his position as a personal assistant to me for seven weeks. Jason has been off for a week and will come back to work – double full time – tomorrow. I am establishing myself: hired a new staff person to spell off Jason, am completing the arrangements to hire my staff through CILT which will give me much greater flexibility, have made arrangements to live at Camphill Nottawasaga in Avalanche until October, and am preparing to move tomorrow to a campground in Toronto for three weeks to participate in the play “The Book of Judith” at the Workman Theatre until the end of May.

We came across the Canadian border on April 28. This moment culminated a truly intense three weeks of presentations given in and around Faribault, Minneapolis and Duluth, Minnesota. In a way the experience was like my giving the doctoral thesis defence that I have never untaken at a university. After decades of personal and professional research and reflection, and eight months of working with Gabor to discover and develop the model of Syncopated Transition we presented it to over twenty audiences. Our listeners were of very different groups, from city councillors and business leaders to musicians to school children. With one exception – a gathering of group home managers – Syncopated Transition sparked everything from interest to revelation – a true success.

Even at the very end two important realizations emerged. The first was that we knew what we were trying to learn at the very beginning. It was in awkwardly trying to describe the sort of process that with minimal resistance breaks down segregation
– what we are now calling a syncopated transition – that I first recognized what a valuable colleague Gabor Podor is. How archetypical is that – to only recognize that one has always known one’s home after a long journey away from its!

Secondly I realized how much in the presentations I was focusing on inclusion instead of peace. I had not freed myself from my identity as a professional advocate. In my last week in Minnesota I broke free of this and we focused our presentations on the potential of inclusion to create peaceful community.

A different sort of work lies ahead. We have decided to create the World Peace through Inclusion Foundation. Our next step is to invite a diverse working team to the Summer Inclusion Institute (www.inclusion.com/toronto2009.pdf) where participants will design the future of WPIF, expand our Syncopated Transition Model and map out its implementation. Out of this gathering will emerge an organization that will increase the body of research on Inclusion and Peace, create sustainable projects demonstrating Inclusion as a tool for peace and community making, and invent and pollinate a practical language of Inclusion to talk about community and diversity.

We are now inviting people and raising money for this July event.

I will also spend the bulk of the summer at Camphill Nottawasaga writing a book about this experience of nine months of preparation, travel and research. This blog will serve as notes in designing the themes of my next book.

We will continue this blog, but from this point on it is a body of work about the creation of the World Peace through Inclusion Foundation and the results of the work undertaken in this framework.
Judith

Sunday, April 19, 2009

Maxed!

Ten days since I last “blogged”! It’s hard to believe.

On top of being an amazing hostess, Barb Handahl is an unbeatable tour manager. Our team of three – Jason, Gabor and I – have completed more than a dozen interviews, presentations, workshops and even two minutes in front of City Council to have Tuesday, April 21, 2009 declared Judith Snow Day in Faribault.

During three of those days I was without a computer. Last February I received a supposedly indestructible laptop – built to military specifications – as part of my work in Savannah. On this Tour it acquired two holes in its casing and then suddenly the screen would not turn on. Fortunately Gabor has been frequently backing up my files and Barb and her family rounded up a spare monitor, then a donor of a brand new laptop, then some help installing some software.

Throughout much of the week I have had sores and inflammation in my mouth and jaw making chewing a challenge. Meanwhile my four year old wheelchair batteries packed it in, and Jason spent the best part of two days either pushing me around or rounding up some new ones. We couldn’t figure out a donor for these, but research revealed a local business who sold them for $300 less than the price quoted by “medical suppliers”.

Needless to say fulfilling an intense presentation schedule, resolving back-to-back crises and participating fully in the extended Handahl family life of birthday parties, breakfasts with Grandpa, etc. has kept us fascinated, rushed, entertained and close to exhausted. In ten days or so we return to Toronto and end the Tour, or at least this leg of it. I expect that reverting to a relatively less intense and more typically structured life is going to seem like some sort of major let down.

In many ways this last leg is like a final exam for us. Will the concept of “Syncopated Transition” carry the inclusion fostering message we intend? Have I, and we, really learned to reach both people who care about diversity and people who know nothing about the struggle for labelled citizens to be seen and supported as citizens?

The Faribault leg of our tour has brought us face-to-face with service providing managers who are running segregated demeaning programs that create huge barriers for communities to discover the contributions of citizens who have unusual abilities. We have interacted with many individuals who are themselves labelled. We have played and coloured with four year olds and gone into elementary school classes. We have been interviewed for radio and two newspaper articles. We have workshopped inclusion with city business leaders. We have sung, talked, argued, prayed and eaten endlessly with a huge variety of people. If it is ever going to “work” - that is if I, and we, are ever going to make an effective impact in shifting a community to see full inclusion as worthwhile and doable – then surely we will have good results emerge in Faribault, Minnesota.

We have three more intensive days in this location. If time and energy permit I will write more about the impact we are having.
Judith

Friday, April 10, 2009

A Five Star Spa

After more van repairs we arrived at 11:50pm last Tuesday at the home of Barb and Harlan Handahl in Faribault, Minnesota. Since then we have been in heaven.

Barb has been keeping up with our blog. She has been touched both by the powerful intention of the tour and by the many large and small hardships we have lived through during the last five months. So on the one hand she, along with Dr. Angela Amato, have lined up nearly three weeks of close to two dozen opportunities for Gabor and I to present Inclusion and Peace in Minnesota. On the other she is hosting us like we are the embodiment of royalty.

We have moved in, each of us with our own room. We are being fed sumptuous meals with homemade cookies and brownies in constant supply day and night. Barb, and her extensive family and network, have lined up free haircuts, gym memberships, golf games, passes to restaurant breakfasts (of which we have NO need), hot tubs, and even access to an accessible bathtub for me at a local senior’s residence. We can do our laundry day or night, our clothes have been mended, and we are continuously being asked if there is anything else we might need or want.

Neither are we being treated as delicate guests. We get to participate in every aspect of this family’s rich life from changing a light bulb, searching for lost keys and resetting the wireless router to playing with the grandkids and taking afternoon naps.

In this wonderfully restorative environment Gabor and I have been improving our presentations, building toward the creation of the World Peace through Inclusion Foundation and having the tough conversations we need to complete the difficulties we experienced in the earlier parts of the Tour. Healing and new growth is emerging in this comforting space.

Meantime we are already hard at work, with an intense schedule facing us after Easter Sunday. So far I have given three media interviews and together we have done another four presentations in three days. My favourite so far was to a group hosted by the Faribault Chamber of Commerce to a group of business leaders. The interaction was lively over the two hours. I was appreciative of the opportunity to get the point across about how much Inclusion opens up economic possibilities and not just better supports. It is all about citizenship!

Happy Easter!
Judith

Wednesday, April 8, 2009

A Cincinnati Weekend by Gabor

We sat in a circle.

[inclusion]

She started by saying: I am angry. You are not listening. The room went silent.

[syncopated]

She broke through by saying: I am the lucky one. Out of my three siblings, I inherited the genes that allowed me to live a life of deep connections, intimacy and adventure. The room gasped and buzzed with excitement.

[transition]

She ended by saying: we did this together. We created the space in which we can be the Gifts that we are for each other. The room laughed as we acknowledged the shared intimacy emerging from the intensity of the last seven hours.

[listen]

On Saturday we went to an Intensive hosted by Peter Block (www.asmallgroup.net) and Jo Krippenstapel. This is a group gathering of about forty citizens. Period. No agendas. No goals. No programs. Emergence, not emergency. Peter has been at the forefront of facilitating the creation of physical and theoretical spaces that foster citizenship. His last book talked to me about two immediate ideas: the way the structure of gatherings create the gathering itself, and that the gathering itself IS the future we are coming together to create. The future is now.

[to the space]

After a bit of getting lost on the grounds of Mount Saint Joseph University, we showed up to share breakfast and mingle with a wide variety of people in a green building called Earth Connection. We started by introducing ourselves and sharing the gift we brought to the gathering. Each and every one of us. We followed by two people singing songs and playing the guitar, all of us joining in on the refrains.

[between]

Then we got down to work. The work of creating citizenship. In the group, and in small groups we explored the sometimes painful and very personal subject of Protection being a barrier, as parents and stewards restrict and police their wards ("To Serve and Protect" is the motto painted on the side of police cruisers world wide) . Of disability as Slavery by another name, as people are bought, sold and oftentimes killed by the service provider organizations based on their attached funding money. Of the wider implications of being the authors of our own lives. Of the exhilarating possibilities latent in powerful listening. Of the power of creative collaboration between people whose voice is usually not heard. Together, we created conversations that transformed us and began to emanate out of the circle into our lives and the wider world. We confronted our own stereotypes and explored ways of being and action that challenge and transform the dominant discourses of oppression. We learned that this is dangerous and sometimes frightening work, but always rewarding. Starhawk says that "Magick is changing consciousness at will". This is exactly what happened on a group level. By Magick, we created each other as citizens. At will.
After lunch, Gary sang Hallelujah by Leonard Cohen and again we all sang the chorus.

[the beats]

Listen. To what is said. From a place of understanding and generosity. Listen to the gifts she brings in her words, actions, ideas, history and herstory. Pain and anger are also gifts expressed as they are energy that transform and are transformed in community. The conversations we took part in were healing because we listened deeply to each other. They brought us together, because in their peculiarity and specificity, they express the common struggles we all face. I asked a question at the end. In a small group, I asked a question about self organization and it's implications for political action. Jo and Ken and Gary, Brenda and I talked about locality, about neighbours, about autonomy and about citizenship. Ha. That word again. I walked away, energized that we are asking some really important questions. Before we left, Judith and I sat around talking to Peter Block. Since the first time I met him, what continues to strike me is his presence. Here is a man, I thought, who is there, wherever he is. He looks you right in the eye, always with a glint, and he poses more questions than gives answers. He really got what we were talking about, and pointed us towards some areas requiring emphasis and clarification regarding the concept of syncopated transition. For the last forty minutes at Earth Connection, we engaged each other in building the future Foundation. I felt like we arrived. Before we left, I thanked him for inviting us and grounding the Tour. This has been a real turning point. That moment for me was the real halfway point of the Tour, with five months passed and one left. Nothing is linear. We are now the community that sustains the real work of Inclusive Citizenship.

[listen]

Monday, April 6, 2009

Minnesota Is Expecting Us

(a Minnesotan press release)

FARIBAULT — A woman who would like to wipe out the word “disabled” is making a stop in Faribault next week.

Judith Snow, 58, of Toronto, Canada, is making Minnesota a destination on her “World Peace Through Inclusion Tour.” She is spending the month of April visiting various places in Minnesota to advocate for those labeled “disabled” to be included as part of society, said Barb Handahl of Faribault.

Handahl got to know Snow through her own work with Minnesota’s State Operated Group Homes. Handahl led an effort to connect people with developmental disabilities with community groups and activities that they could benefit from being a part of. She met Snow at a inclusion conference.

“Judith is a very intelligent and remarkable woman,” Handahl said.

Snow has no use of her body below the neck except for the ability to move one thumb. The use of that thumb allows her to drive a motorized cart to get around. But, Handahl said, Snow depends on attendants for her personal care needs.

In spite of her physical mobility limitations, Snow has earned two master’s degrees and traveled to three continents advocating inclusion of people with disabilities in society.

So many barriers exist to keep those label “disabled” from fully being part of society, Handahl said.

“Judith envisions what the world would look like if everyone was included in it, and accepted for who they are,” Handahl said.

Snow has worked for more than 30 years throughout the United States, the United Kingdom, Europe, the Caribbean and Canada advocating for training and education programs for people with disabilities. Her models resulted in thousands of people with disabilities getting jobs, homes, new relationships and support systems that lead them to greater participation in their communities.

Snow will be speaking to the Faribault’s Future leadership group from 2 to 4:30 p.m. Thursday, April 9. From 5:30 to 7:30 p.m. that evening, a potluck to welcome her to town will be held at the Faribault Chamber of Commerce and Tourism office.

After her initial visit to Faribault, Snow will speak at a conference and events in St. Paul. But on April 19, she returns to Faribault for a special concert. From 2:30 to 4 p.m. that day at JavaLive coffee house, local folk signer Rafi Dworsky will be join Snow for a presentation for young children.

She will give presentations at Eagan, Rochester, Minneapolis and Duluth before returning to Canada on April 27.

Who: Judith Snow, international advocate for inclusion of people with disabilities.

Where: Faribault Chamber of Commerce office, 530 Wilson Ave.

When: 5:30 p.m. potluck, 6:30 p.m. conversation and desert, April 9

How: Call Barb Handahl, 507-210-0711 to register to attend

— Staff writer Pauline Schreiber may be reached at 333-3127.

Sunday, March 29, 2009

In Two Voices

It is a real pleasure that Gabor has taken to keeping up this blog with me. I don't feel as guilty when I don't post for a week or so!

As I write it is Sunday and I am sitting in "Derek's Cafe" at 15 Parkside, Barrie, in the arms of Sophia Creek, Camphill. Last night we had Bible Study - Camphill style - something like a Quaker friends gathering with readings from the Camphill story as well as scripture and room for each person present to be silent and to reflect publicly on how they feel the Spirit of Light is calling them as an individual and as a member of the community.

Our present reflections are filled with the wonderings of how we will find and afford housing for all those who want to be physically present in Sophia Creek. I am not the only one figuring that one out.

Gabor, Jason and I left River's End Campground last Wednesday. We have "gigs" coming up in Ohio and Minnesota, but the bulk of the World Peace through Inclusion Tour is now behind us.

For me this primarily means beginning the work of gathering up the stories and reflections of all I and we have experienced and learned over five months. It means building something unique, generative and valuable on the foundation of the work and experience that this period in my life made possible. It also means cleaning up the "messes" that this abrupt shift in my life created - hurt feelings, lost communications, anxieties and exhaustions that others experienced because I took such a dramatic direction last October.

Leaving Tybee and Savannah brought me several moments of real tears. As we drove through and away from the city I was nearly overwhelmed by the memories flooding from almost every corner, park and building. I have lived more intensely in these places than anywhere in my adult life. Tybee is my home in a unique way - not just because of the marshes and pelicans, the campground pot lucks and the windy beach walks, but also because I took and found the opportunity here to find my own roots - the place from which I can truly continue to build inclusion.

I have discovered that home is not necessarily where you like to be. There were many moments when it has been very difficult to be in Tybee and Savannah. Home is where for better and worse you can find your ground and discover who you can truly make yourself into. At 59 I am late coming to this place. But then it is said that Frank Lloyd Wright did his best work between ages 60 and 90.

This summer I will restabilize my home and personal assistance, finish my second book, and most importantly work with Gabor and others to create the World Peace through Inclusion Foundation. Our chief work is to research and develop the model of building inclusive community through syncopated transitions. An explanation I gave to Gabor one hot summer afternoon to describe how to approach developing community right in the midst of the "institution" has become the core of a promising model of inclusive transformations.

The end of the journey was present in its beginning.
Judith

Thursday, March 19, 2009

Reflection at the Sentient Bean

I am sitting in the Sentient Bean coffee shop, downtown Savannah. It is a cafe owned by Kristin Russell, a good friend and supporter of Judith and the Tour. Judith and I have given two workshops here called Nights of Inclusion (the third one got cancelled because of our sudden return to Toronto), and I have played music here several times. I biked for about 45 minutes from Susan Earl's late husband's condo where I am currently staying at until Wednesday, when we take our final leave of this beautiful city. I have been going through the pictures I took at the St Patrick's Day parade yesterday. Some of them turned out excellent, I posted about 30 of the on Facebook, but the compression algorithm they use really wash the vibrant colors out. Still, they look great, it was the first sunny and warm day after about a week of rain.

Tom Kohler came by and hung out by my table for half an hour, so I copied some of the pictures onto his hard drive. Tom is one of the few people that I have gotten to know well on this trip and he has become one of my heroes. He truly represents for me what inclusive community organizing is about. I met Tom last summer at the Toronto Summer Institute, which is a week long gathering of worldwide Inclusionists, organized by Jack Pearpoint of the Inclusion Network. He is the coordinator and ED of Chatham-Savannah Citizen Advocacy, and he is the ultimate pF* Social Networker. (*pre-Facebook) A native of Savannah, he has been at this since CA was invented, effectively growing and steering his organization through tides of change that constitute the modern history of his beloved city. I would hazard that he is truly one of the few individuals responsible for the city's amazing renaissance throughout the seventies and eighties, through his tireless efforts to connect and network, and his insatiable desire to create an engaged citizenry.

Tom knows everyone. This is not an exaggeration. By first and last name, where and when they met, what they do and who they know, who and how their spouses, children, pets...etc are. And he cares. Genuinely. This is what truly distinguishes Tom: he advances the radical notion that we are all connected, and this connection is really worth cultivating at every level, simply because this is who we truly are. Do you need to borrow a car in a short notice to get to a job interview out of town? He knows someone who will lend you one, simply because Tom will vouch for you. Is your sister organizing a discussion forum on Civil Rights and The Role of the Southern Church? Tom knows just the right key note speaker, here is her phone number. Are you interested in hiring a new parking attendant for your city department? He knows the disadvantaged black youth looking for a way to finance his college degree. But really, who are you? What turns your crank? That is what Tom is interested in finding out. What is your passion that makes you who you are? That is what makes you valuable if you take up his challenge to express yourself - not just for you and yours. Take a leap of faith and open it to the community. Whose community? Does it matter? just share it, dammit. With whoever cares. Funny, that this sharing of your gift is actually what creates the community in which you can share your gift.

I have learnt from Tom that there is a type of engagement that transcends the deepest divisions of class, race, history, religion and other dividers running through this beautiful city built on the swamp. Savannah, with its centuries old oak trees that have seen alligators, slavery, lynchings and SUVs is a city with real soul. This is where the meandering Savannah river meets the ocean and creates a unique wetland ecosystem that supports just about every type of sub-tropical flora and fauna you can think of. Pine trees, palm trees, wetland grasses and wild tropical flowers coexist and complement each other on the historic city streets; black oaks, covered in a type of symbiotic overhanging moss create a rich canopy of moody afternoons in many of the downtown parks frequented by students of the Savannah College of Art and Design (OCAD with a soul). I fell in love with Tom's vision of the Savannah that is possible through the passion and commitment to involve and include everyone of his fellow citizens in the process of the city creating itself.

In closing, I wanted to insert two entries here. First is a short bio of Tom from the SCSA website:

"Tom Kohler, Coordinator and Executive Director, is a native of Savannah. He attended the public schools in Chatham County and graduated in 1970 from Herschel V. Jenkins High School. After this, he attended Armstrong State College and the University of Georgia, where he received his degree in 1976.

Tom has been involved with people who have disabilities since he was 15 years old. His first involvement was through a volunteer experience at the Temple Youth Group at Mickve Israel Temple. Tom has been the Coordinator for the Chatham-Savannah Citizen Advocacy for the past 31 years.

In the early days, Tom was taught that the question was “In what ways is this person broken and how do we fix them?” It has taken thirty years to get to a better question, “The world has a deep crack in it;, how do we try and stitch it back together?” This question follows Buckminster Fuller’s maxim, “Life is long; pick something big and interesting and work on it.”

The second one is an e-mail that Judith and I received regarding the workshops we gave this weekend:

"Dear Judith and Gabor,

Thank you both for all that you did for citizen advocacy Sunday and Monday. We have had such positive feedback from both our Board members and the group of advocates and community members. Some of the comments are posted below:

“Provocative…more than provocative!”
“It was the best one I have been at, in literally years and years.”
“I heard things today that I never thought about before.”
“Every citizen advocate needs to hear her, those “trigger words” are now in my mind.”

I am personally challenged to move from the private to the public. I look forward to other opportunities to experience your gifts. Please let us know when you are returning to the Atlanta area.

Sincerely,

Derona King, Coordinator

Citizen Advocacy of Atlanta & DeKalb, Inc."

Written by Gabor, March 18

Saturday, March 14, 2009

Explanation

I just returned from a short walk to the beach. Lara is off to a job interview, Jason is in Tampa golfing, Gabor is hanging out in Atlanta. I am alone - or at least by myself – for two hours with Charlie, Lara’s dog.

It is a blustery, chilly day in Tybee. Although the campground is filling up and tourists were everywhere on my little journey to the beach no one is swimming today. The tide is coming in with real surf – the kind of waves that indicate the undertow so many signs on the north end of the island warn swimmers about.

Everywhere there are signs of both devastation and renewal. Parts of palms and trees are scattered about and last night, when I got back to Avalanche at 6:00 PM, it was clear that the electricity had been off for most of the two weeks I had been away. Likely a big storm had passed through.

With the electricity off the fridge had been off too. Neither Jason nor Lara could stomach the job of cleaning up the rot and mold, but once again the generous staff of River’s End Campground came through for me.

At the same time vigorous new palms are growing through the boardwalk that takes me to the beach and – glory be praised – the tides of Tybee have already reclaimed much of the new sand that was carefully dredged up and laid down by the City Council in December, to extend this tourist resource out into the ocean. This is a celebration for me because once again I can reach the water’s edge on the blue and white striped runner that has been laid out by the same City Council so that wheelchair users can reach the ocean. Next week I will be able to stroll on the hard packed sand at low tide.

The gulls were flying low today. Two young pelicans flew right over me, a mere twelve feet above my head. I felt welcomed back.

I can only stay now less than two weeks – including three days taken out to do workshops in Macon and Atlanta – before it’s on to Ohio and Minnesota to finish the Tour. This fact, along with all the effort and sacrifice required to rebuild the foundation so that Gabor could return and Jason could join us, puts me in mind of why I came in the first place to this magical place. Why did I leave my home, spend my money and body, endure cold, accidents and illness, risk my funding for support, and strain my relationships with family, friends and assistants? Was it only to be with palm trees and pelicans?

I know the answer – I always have. But I realize that I have rarely expressed it in public. Therein lies the heart of most of my difficulties. As public as I appear to be I still have secrets that I hold to myself.

There are people in the world who are currently called “developmentally delayed” – they still are often called “severely retarded” in private. In my childhood I was frequently put with them because my support requirements are the same. From that early age I continue to experience a great kinship and communication with people who do not speak. I know that some of my greatest gifts are from this side of my nature.

At the same time I have a great kinship with people who do speak – the so called “normal”. I know that some of my greatest gifts are from this side of my nature.

My drive to build inclusion is very much rooted in my personal desire to live in a world where I am not required to pretend to be either one or the other. What sort of world would permit me to freely and responsibly be both a partner in a number of relationships with deeply caring, skilled and responsive personal assistants – to live the publicly intimate and vulnerable nature my body holds me in - and, in one time and in one body, be an intelligent, articulate, passionate, spiritually and emotionally strong woman?

I came to Tybee after decades of groping toward a better way to both ask and answer the question. Everything I have tried until last summer has led me to dead ends. In a world where either one is disabled or one is normal, if I am to have any measure of public freedom and safety I had better play to my normal side every time.

Of course I’m stating it too baldly. There have always been ways that I could find to live fully. But just the same the barriers still snap back into place every time. I could get a job, buy a house, start and lead groups and projects, make friends and colleagues, but the “me” who does these things doesn’t openly also get to be the “me” who lives in the intimate space occupied by those who usually don’t speak and who live through the will and care of others, contributing in return a spiritual and emotional connectedness rarely available to folks with bodies that support the illusion of independence.

In the year of 1955 I became aware of my spiritual commission to create a world where the silent could be appreciated for their gifts, contributions and being. In the year of 2007 I cracked – in the sense that it became unbearable to me to live and work in a world of jobs, private homes and private lives. Two other people – like me also labeled and working as token advocates in a service agency – suffered heart attacks within a year of each other, and one died. I took it as writing on the wall, and retired.

After more than 50 years of living to create inclusive society I was disgusted and discouraged with my lack of success. Much has changed and some of that change is even attributed to me. But my aim is neither to be famous nor to have a movement of change based on my thinking. I both want to be “we” and I want for quiet, unusual people to be appreciated and supported to contribute as full citizens in a real world of community – just as they are – not having to pretend to be as normal as possible.

I need to find another way to open the doors. Advocating, meeting, lobbying, resisting, fighting – these either are unavailable or can’t work for quiet, unusual people. We need our own way to transform the world – a way as vulnerable and intimate as ourselves. I want to discover, perhaps create, that way.

With the entrance of Gabor, the techno DJ, community loving, party seeking, closet intellectual, into my life a new version of my dream became possible. Gabor entered into conversations about transformation. He understood what I meant – even led me further than I intended to go – when I explained that inclusion is like inserting a disruptive rhythm into a well established beat so that the music isn’t stopped but is altered so that suddenly a new dance is possible.

And so the World Peace through Inclusion Tour was born. Gabor was up for it even though he risked working for four months without pay. I was up for it, largely unconscious of what I was risking, but desperate for a road out of futility.

It has been much harder than I could have imagined. The details are in this blog.

It also has given me a vision of inclusion that can succeed. It has given me the answer to my constant question – “What do I want to do with my life?”

So, no – I am not bent on a permanent vacation with palms and pelicans and I am not dangerously naïve and stubborn. I am looking for a path for those of us with capacities unrecognized in the world to achieve our full human stature. I think I may have found it.

Judith

Sunday, March 8, 2009

Third Leg

Late tomorrow Gabor Podor, Jason Wiles and I will start back for Atlanta, Gabor to resume his Excellence Seminar and Jason and I to catch the Welcome Wednesday supper at First Presbyterian in Savannah.

Gabor and I are on the mend.

Jason is a new and enthusiastic personal assistant, strong and ready to work hard and to further the action of the World Peace through Inclusion Tour.

We will keep in touch.

Judith

Wednesday, March 4, 2009

The Foundation Collapsed

I guess it’s easy to notice that my energy has been flagging lately. Originally I wrote three times a week in this blog. Right now I am down to less than once a week.

On another note, the flavour of the writing in this blog is very mixed. Mostly it’s me, Judith, posting. I welcome the participation of others and thank those who have been commenting. I have not yet figured out how to keep a dialogue going between myself and the followers, or between the followers themselves – someday I will figure that out! I started out with the intention of reporting on the events and results of the Tour, expecting to post several videos of talks and gatherings. Instead the majority of the posts have been more personal journal-like entries.

Am I OK? Yes, and No. Today I am “camping” in Barrie, in a house full of members of the Sophia Creek community. Gabor is in Ancaster, Ontario, with his parents. He has resigned as a personal assistant and is considering what further role he wants to have with the Tour.

The crucial roadblocks showed up early in January. A kingpin contract was canceled at the point it was supposed to begin. This ran us on the rocks in terms of finding the money both to create videos of the work and to find alternative ways to pay Gabor as a personal assistant and David as a back-up and a videographer, NABORS still refused to pay on the basis that the Ministry of Health policy is that I cannot receive funded services for this many weeks outside my province. At the same time we lost the capacity to join two or three other organizations, including youth initiatives, into this one project, creating something with lasting impact. We were stopped!

At the same time I was having migraine, anger and depression in reaction to a medication I was taking to handle the post-bronchitis asthma-like reactions to smokers, swamp smells and the local pulp and paper mill. I quit the medication!

Gabor started to develop a sore back.

Then it emerged that I had terminated my travel/medical insurance by going back to TO for 5 days in January. I looked around and discovered an alternative provider, but in the meantime, through Gabor’s urgings and Skype meetings of my support circle it became apparent that our circumstances were too insecure and we had better return home.

Of course, where’s home?

We left the trailer in Tybee and I returned to Camphill. I have also stayed several nights at the home of the Galati’s. They have an accessible bathtub, which has made a huge difference to my stress level!

Along the way I fell twice in two makeshift beds. The long drives and the falls served to worsen Gabor’s back.

Once here my circle and I went to work to restore the foundation so we can continue. Talks to sort out issues and refresh Gabor’s and my relationship. Conversations between leaders in several service providing and transfer payment agencies. Baths and massages. Hiring a new “roadie” and gathering a few back-up staff for my time running between Toronto and Barrie. Downtime with friends. Good meals.

A week and a half later some resolutions to the flow of funding seem to be brewing. But the foundation is far from solid. Gabor resigned.

I am far from my trailer. I have five commitments in Georgia that I would be a fool to drop or run back to do – a lose/lose situation for sure. I have no home. I have too little backing from the “service providing system” to give me the support I need to continue to be an international builder of World Peace through Inclusion.

Of course even this has taught me much. In the midst of the January bronchitis, medication headaches and deep discussions with Gabor to deal with our mutual stresses I had great insight - I realized that an incident when I was very young had scared me deeply. As part of that the little girl Judith became afraid that someday she would run into something that scared her SO BADLY she couldn't handle it. This paradoxically made me keep trying scarier things, unconsciously trying to vaccinate myself against my own fear. Now I have seen this I can stop doing this, because I now know what I actually want to do with my life and throughout all three plus months I've been scared enough to satisfy myself that I can handle fear. I am free to build from a much less risky place.

The brightest spot on the horizon is that Jason Wiles has been present and training with me for ten days, knows what is happening and is up for the challenge.

Any ideas – please be in touch.

Judith

Sunday, February 8, 2009

The Bicycle - A Story

I drafted this story in December. Its purpose is to illustrate how inclusion fundamentally arises from the contributions people are making, and not from designing a “better” world that someday, maybe we will let them be part of.

In subsequent blogs I will explain the three levels of inclusion that I hope are illustrated herein. This is very much a draft. Likely I will find that I need to rewrite parts of this story as we work on it together.

The Bicycle

INTRODUCTION
Dad – David – is a city bureaucrat and a citizen advocate for a voiceless young man in a state run nursing home – Chris

Chris enjoys collecting small plastic toys

The family consists of wife - Joan, David and 3 kids – Joe is 10, burly, egocentric and greedy

They regularly attend a church with a social conscience.

Only David has met Chris

BEGINNING
David, disturbed by the materialism of Christmas, decides to follow Chris’ example of enjoying simple pleasures. This idea turns out to be a hard sell with the family, especially Joe who has his heart set on a specific bicycle

CHRISTMAS
As their extended family gathers, Joan is cooking an extra fabulous dinner since she has extra time because she has not had to buy and wrap many gifts. Each person gives each person a simple gift, costing 0 to 5 dollars, chosen with that person’s capacities and interests in mind.

As the thoughtfulness and creativity emerge, people become more and more excited. They become uncharacteristically interested in each other’s gifts, and appreciative of the newly enjoyable interaction – except grumpy Joe.

Every one of Joe’s gifts is a coin or bill, and as time passes others sureptiously pass him some cash. By the end of the day he has accumulated $21.53. Joe is confused. He loves the money and the attention but it’s no where near enough for a bicycle. Nor does he actually want to be thought of as only a money grubber.

After dinner, to Joan’s shock, Joe offers to help with the dishes.

Post Christmas
Filled with curiousity about Joe’s confusion, David takes opportunities to talk to him and also invites him to his next visit with Chris. At the visit Joe is uncharacteristically silent and visibly uncomfortable, but offers to come on the next visit too. In the meantime he gets excited by discussions about how to turn his $21.53 into enough for a bicycle.

Early in February Joan and David are both shocked to discover that their credit cards have 0 balances!

Pre Spring Break
Through a series of small investments and odd jobs, strong arming everyone who was present at Christmas dinner, Joe has raised his cash to $60.79. On the way to a visit to Chris, Joe and David see the exact bicycle in a going out of business sale and buy it on the spot for $49.99. Joe proudly shows it off to Chris, riding it around and around the room. Chris beams with joy.

After Spring Break
Guys at school tease Joe about the time he spending with Chris. Joe is confused and starts a fist fight where another child ends up with a broken arm.

Fortunately the school uses restorative justice instead of zero tolerance and Joan, Joe and David find themselves facing the injured child, his parents and several other children plus school officials at a gathering led by a justice oriented listener. As each person explains the incident and its impact on them it emerges how frightening teasing is to the children and how no one seems to know how to deal with it. Joe, near tears, and talking mainly to his parents, explains how he doesn’t know how to be both a person who likes and respects Chris and a regular boy who makes fun of “gays” and “retards”.

No one has ever seen Joe be so vulnerable and articulate.

The resolution of the meeting includes a decision to bring Chris to the school and have Joe and his classmates make a presentation about inclusion.

Next Christmas
The nursing home made less profit this year, so the executives decide to cut costs by closing it and laying off staff for the holidays. Chris has no place to go and will be permanently moved to a bigger facility in North Carolina, two states away. Instead the church and several people connected to the school organize a ten day vacation for Chris at the church’s retreat house, with paid and volunteer helpers, and a return to the same nursing home when it reopens. All goes well and Chris goes to Joan’ and David’s for Christmas dinner. Joe does not receive even one quarter and he doesn’t seem to even notice the gifts he does get because he is too busy helping Chris open his plastic toys and eat his pureed ham and turkey dinner.

When Joe helps take Chris back to the nursing home on Jan. 3, he quietly notices Chris longingly looking at the top drawer of his dressing table. Joe peeks into the drawers and he has an insight.

Joe takes his remaining $10 from last year’s bicycle fund and, working with the shop teacher and his classmates, he constructs a wall hung display cabinet and some picture frames. A few weeks later the entire class participates in putting Chris’ bedraggled family pictures back together with clear tape and into beautiful, simple frames, and in organizing the plastic toys Chris chooses by eye blinks into the locked display cabinet. The most prominent toy is the one Joe gave Chris for Christmas – a happy clown on a bicycle.

The End

Judith

Wednesday, February 4, 2009

Thursday, January 29, 2009

Set Back Again

I certainly get tired of running into these long gaps of time. It has been so many days since I have had the opportunity to write a new message on this blog. For me this is another reason why I am inviting people to post messages themselves. There are too many days that go by with no new information or inspiration!

Almost two weeks ago now I woke up to realize that I had a "perfect" opportunity to go back to Toronto and be present for some very important gatherings. SO I collected my frequent flyer points, and Gabor and I flew back to Toronto and Barrie last Friday and returned to Atlanta yesterday.

I won't drag on about the grueling details of aborted flights, having my wheelchair trashed twice by the airlines, bitter cold and white-out driving conditions, and very very very late nights. Suffice it to say that the experience was both worthwhile and nerve-stretching grueling for both Gabor and I.

We stayed at Aki Feseheye's place, and were warmly welcomed and supported. In addition, Katie and others helped Gabor get a well deserved break. I fit in as many friends as possible and held a circle meeting at my father's residence. It was so good to see him and them again. I took a quick visit to my cat's, and on seeing how much they love their new home and Ally their new mom, I gave them to Ally. It's a match made in Heaven. But I will always miss them.

The first thing that was accomplished was that I attended the Camphill Communities of Ontario board meeting, said goodbye to my God Daughter Annie Green as she moves back to a new life sharing community in Colorado, and took another step toward moving into Sophia Creek. I felt that My beloved Camphill friends needed my physical presence so that plans for my residence in the community would not once again go on the back burner. The severe doldrums of a Canadian winter can make you feel like very little is possible. It was good for us to rekindle the vision of my full membership in this wonderful gathering.

On a completely related mission I gathered my circle and we strategized about having my transfer payment agency see their way clear to pay Gabor and to support me in my move to Barrie. This required a meeting with a committee on that board. I think we made some progress, and we will have a better sense of that in about a month. It was good to have the full support of my circle. It was also good to realize that my taking a stand to do my life and work in a way that allows me to freely reach out to the world is important not just for me but for everyone else who uses personal assistance.

I also got to reconnect with my Toronto Wisdom Community, and realize how much I am appreciated and missed. I slipped in a meeting with my doctor and got myself on a new medication which seems to finally be lessening my bronchial symptoms. Last but not least, I got to reconnect with Ray Warren and the Ancilla Foundation. I realized that our efforts to create an economic support to building inclusion are finally beginning to take hold.

We had to come back to Atlanta rather quickly because Gabor is registered in the Landmark Advanced Course this weekend. It warms my heart to realize that he takes to this form of empowerment pretty much the same as I do. In a way I was sorry to leave Toronto so quickly, but at the same time, our work in Georgia is really just beginning.

On the flight back, my wheelchair was dropped by the baggage handlers and the damage was substantial. This is actually being typed by Lara Howell as I am lying in bed.
So once again, huge barriers to keeping up with the work have emerged. This leaves me a little discouraged and certainly very tired. But at the same time, I know that we will get through this and even while it is happening, the work will continue.

In the very near future, hopefully by mid-February, David, Lara, Gabor and I will be hard at work on an Inclusion, School-based project that will engage a wide variety of kids, teenagers, and faculty members. My hope is that in my next blog message I will be able to give you details of this potentially far-reaching initiative. It will make all the obstacles seem trivial relative to its huge potential.

In the meantime, it is time for a well deserved good-night's rest.

Judith

Wednesday, January 21, 2009

Things that Go “Clunk”

Yesterday, Barack Hussein Obama was inaugurated as the 44th President of the United States.

Today I began to breathe normally for the first time in six weeks.

Monday I woke up to: “I ought to go back to Toronto for the Allocations Committee Meeting” of the agency that my personal assistance is attached to.

Today all the important pieces – reasonable flights, places to stay, insurance on and availability of the Dodge, etc. came together and Gabor and I will be in Camphill and Toronto from Friday night to Wednesday afternoon, meeting with my circle, and firming up arrangements to create a home base at Camphill Sophia Creek.

For three months the World Peace through Inclusion Tour has worked hard to (re)establish connection and energy so that inclusion work can flourish in this area with such rich potential.

Today, at dinner with the diversity team of the Savannah Country Day School, and based on previous connections with AWOL, Chatham-Savannah Citizen Advocacy, the Southern Collective for Inclusive Citizenship, and the First Presbyterian Church of Savannah, a multi-year project was drafted.

It’s like a slipping clutch engaged.

Judith

Sunday, January 18, 2009

Describing Inclusion

Inclusion
My getting better continues at a slow, uneven pace. Yesterday Gabor, David and I participated in a Citizen Advocacy luncheon – I didn’t eat anything. The talk and discussion went very well. We got our best video yet. Tomorrow I will be doing an open mike night at the Sentient Bean, along with a group named AWOL – a group aimed at using e-technology to get kids job skills, cash and positive entry to the economic aspects of their world.

In between I have been in bed mainly, still coughing but less, figuring out strategies to deal with chronic acid reflux and eating baby sized meals. It looks like we beat this one too.

As I have had lots of time to reflect, both consciously and in dream-like states. I have evolved a strategy for communicating the peace growing power of inclusion. I intend to share this strategy in the blog.

Tonight I want to share a 3 stage description of inclusion I have been working with. In later blogs, in the near future, I will share some stories that wrap around this.

Of course the concept “inclusion” is not related only to people who are labeled disabled. When women were first demanding and implementing their rights and abilities to participate in political and economic life, the social results were inclusion. When people from non-English or French speaking parts of the world move into Toronto, find their way in cultural, spiritual and economic ways in the city, and broadly influence the opportunities of that city, that is also inclusion.

In the past twenty years and more a great deal has been written and said about inclusion. I have sat on two consulting committees about this subject and have been amazed at how much can be said, written and researched. I am not one to favour making things more complex. Complex talk is one strategy that excludes many people who have disability labels. I have been working on ways to talk about how peace shows up at different stages of inclusion. I want to begin sharing more of this work here.

Let me know how the following writing strikes you.

It can be said that one person includes another. An example would be when a women invites a new friend who lives in a nursing home to regularly attend church with her. It can also be said that an organization includes individuals, as when a school makes all its classrooms welcoming to children who learn in non-academic ways. It can also be said that one group includes another, as when an “all white” baseball league and an “all black” baseball league become just a baseball league.

When people first talk about inclusion they usually mean something like: “You are welcome to be in my space but I will make no changes in my world because you showed up. You must act as if you are just like me, or leave.” When women first worked where men did, and when people in wheelchairs first went to university they often struggled to find a restroom they could use at work.

As inclusion progresses, the “including” person or group gets to the point where they recognize that changes in structure and policy would assist the “included” person or group to participate more effectively. This is the stage of “reasonable accommodation”. Ramps are built, ESL classes emerge and targeted housing subsidies are funded. The included are still mainly expected to fit in, keep up, and stop at “their level”.

The most creative and effective stage of inclusion is reached when everyone realizes that we are not all the same and that we don’t have to be. It is the stage when there is no longer anything to be “included into”. All sides recognize that their unique differences are real and are also opportunities for each other’s growth and enjoyment. Each is ready to explore what can be let go of and what can be enhanced so that a new world that works for all can be created. As an example, where classrooms have been inclusive at this level methods of teaching have been evolved, students have taken on more intimate and respectful roles and relationships among themselves and with their teachers, and the daily activities and interests have shifted across entire school boards.

It would be nice to think this progression came easily. In reality it is hard won in most cases, with many virtual and actual battles fought to keep the dialogue going.

Although I am primarily a champion of the most creative level of inclusion, greater peace can show up at all levels. I will write about this in subsequent entries.

Judith

Tuesday, January 13, 2009

Bronchitis, not Larangitis

Gabor doesn't appreciate the difference, a difference which is life threatening for me. However, Gabor especially, and also David and Lara, have been present and fabulous - shaking, slapping, pushing, massaging (officially called assisted coughing) - whatever it takes to get the guck up so I can keep on breathing. Today has been a little better, and I have been up a few hours, breathing, eating, getting my hair washed and catching up on e-mail.

As Gabor wrote it has also been an intimate time of sharing and recreating our commitment to inclusion, the tour and to life itself. After a valiant and successful struggle to get one mucous clot up I told him I'd give him three more years!

It's clear this respite at the other end of the Rabbit Hole is time limited. The work and we need a base, a home, a strategy and resources. But I could not have planned for or imagined a more valuable research retreat than the past few months have been.

As always there is more to say but time and breath (for the puff/sip Morse Code) are limited.

Love; Judith

The Power of Stories

This is the story of WPIT. This is my first blog. This is Gabor. The character in the background. The Personal Assistant. The muscle. In the story. We have been cooped up in the trailer for the last few days, on account of Judith being in bed with a severe case of laryngitis. Antibiotics, rest and lots of assisted coughing. So I was called on to write a blog this morning. I can’t hide any more. I’m a bit shy, stepping out of the shadows, still blinking from the spotlight. But don’t let that fool you. I just need to get used to it a bit.
Judith thinks she is getting better today. We have been engaged in a conversation about health and vitality over the last few days, naturally. We have been telling stories about peace and inclusion. In contrast, the story of our Tour has been one of the Maverick setting out to conquer that Monolithic Codex of Disability. A valuable heroic and romantic tale, only serving to reinforce the discourse of individual. The true power of the Tour lies in living and spreading inclusion in community. We are creating the possibility of shifting the story today. Our health and vitality restored to new powerful heights through the story that you and I and we all create. I invite you all to share your stories about Peace and Inclusion, and I will continue to bring some of our stories from my perspective from now on. Love and Light.

Gabor

Thursday, January 8, 2009

Near the Point of Having a Plan

We are very close to having a plan!

This may sound strange considering that about 35% of our allotted time to be out of Ontario has passed. Just the same I feel that this is hard won real progress.

Before I left on this Tour I was deeply frustrated by what seemed to me to be a general failure on my part to get traction with the idea that there is no such thing as a disabled person. Other concepts that I have been instrumental in rooting in practice are more accepted, such as support circles. The idea has generally caught on that planning supports for the fuller participation of a vulnerable person ought to be centered on that person and their gifts. However the understanding of both “gifts” and “participation” is not sufficiently grounded in the related concepts of capacity and citizenship, and so the widely adopted use of person centred planning generally fails to allow labeled people to escape the disability paradigm.

And so my deep mission remains unfulfilled. Unusual people still get categorized as disabled, still are streamed into a segregated world where they have the role of “being helped” or worse, and still are vulnerable to being murdered to get rid of the “burden” on family, the economy and society.

In addition I have an intuitive grasp on a possibility that inclusion can lead to transformation in social and economic relationships. But making that possibility present and engaging to others continues to elude me.

The deepest reason for the Tour was to get me close enough to people on their home territory that I could have person-to-person dialogue about inclusion and what opens up for people who struggle to build it – in particular about how inclusion leads people to become more peaceful.

On Tuesday Gabor and I had lunch with a woman who has not met me before. She has over 30 years experience as a citizen advocate. She has had close relationship with two people who are considered to be disabled, one of whom became a friend and one of whom she considers challenging to know and relate to. As I talked about inclusion and how people report great personal benefits from it, in particular that they become more peaceful, her face lit up in recognition. She understood when I pointed out that this knowledge is understood on a personal, private level, but is not recognized or acknowledged on a public, policy or political level. I got my point across!

One on one strategies of engagement are a time honoured organizing practice invented I believe by Saul Alinsky and his colleagues. I guess I shouldn’t be surprised that I am experiencing some effectiveness. But the effectiveness is short lived if it is not followed up with founding a team or organization committed to building the insights and enthusiasm into strategies that will ground the energy into everyday practice.

While I was on the Year End Cruise I was confronted with how I have not yet fully stood behind my own mission. In other words, for all good reasons, I have been collecting the bricks and wood, the tools and the site, but I have not truly begun to build the house.

Beyond this I also have not yet fully taken up the leadership which can create a space for inclusion and peace to thrive and be fully adopted in the world. Instead I have been getting ready.

I think I am ready.

Several elements of a plan of action are emerging and over the next week or so, along with Gabor and others, I will flesh them out into a detailed project. This plan will include further research, reframing inclusion and personal assistance, and organizational building. I am imagining that I will be able to come home – wherever home turns out to be – with a new and effective capacity to bring the space of full citizenship for everyone to the world.

Judith

Monday, January 5, 2009

A Prosperous New Year for All!

(Written Jan. 1)

Happy New Year!

As hoped, being on the cruise and in the course “Simple Pleasures” has opened a space for me to learn about better ways for me to fulfill on the World Peace through Inclusion Tour and to spread the message. But first, the details of the cruise.

We are on the Adventure of the Seas, a Royal Caribbean ship. We sailed out of San Juan, Puerto Rico for a day and a half and on Tuesday, Dec. 30, 2008 docked in Aruba. I went shopping and found a discount mall where I bought a swim suit, sports bra and some panties.

Next day, in Curacao, Aaron and a Landmark friend Brad Grandbouche, took me swimming in the ocean. It was perfect!

Later I had my make-up done for the New Year’s Eve party and I have to admit I was pretty stunning. The Landmark Education group (about 350) had its own big band party in the Imperial Lounge, and after midnight Aaron and I danced and strolled along the Royal Promenade before retiring early this morning.

Today ii a sea day and tomorrow we will have a day in the port of Philipsburg, St. Maarten.

In between I have been at work developing my strategies for the tour which in Landmark language I call “my impossible promise”. This phrase is a jargony term used by graduates of the Wisdom Unlimited course who have also completed or are interested in a higher level course called Power and Contribution.

I took this course about 3 ½ years ago and realized in it that nothing could make me happier or more fulfilled than focusing my life on creating inclusion. This means to me creating a stable group of people who work successfully at having diversity become welcome and invited into our communities and societies. Diversity is a powerful source of economic and social opportunity. Every opportunity can only exist if there is a difference that makes it possible for people to form relationship and mutual action. Inclusion can be a benefit no matter what diversity is at stake, but I have the most interest and personal experiences with the diversities that get labeled “disabilities”

The phrase “Impossible Promise” refers to a mission to transform something far beyond our own personal lives. The “impossible” part is the reality that some missions require a transformation in society to make the outcome possible. In the present world understanding that certain characteristics are “disabilities” and that these characteristics must be viewed as “impairments” and be reduced, eliminated or accommodated as much as possible full inclusion is not possible because the opportunity creating capacity of these differences is not appreciated for their community, relationship and economy creating potential.

A part of my mission to create inclusion is that in the late ‘80’s I began to notice that people became more peaceful when they took on becoming inclusive. I decided that people need to know that this road to peace is available to them particularly since other pathways to peace seem closed to most societies.

Nevertheless after my Power and Contribution course I mostly avoided having anything very constructive to do with my Impossible Promise of World Peace through Inclusion. After all I don’t want to be a world leader – it’s too much trouble and potentially dangerous!

I worked on and off at getting someone to measure the peace making nature of inclusion. The idea behind this was that since lots of people pay closer attention to results that are publically measured and reported like projects designed around the Millennium Goals then if the peace building capacity of inclusion were measured it would eventually enter into public consciousness.

Two lengthy efforts at building such a measurement project failed and I was pretty much ready to give up on the whole idea when I also became aware in the summer of 2007 of how much I hated working for a government funded agency as a support circle builder. By October 2007 I “retired” and took off to Savannah in January 2008 to write an autobiography.

The ensuing months did not lead to a book but they did lead to an understanding that I could redesign my life so that I could reach people in their homes and intimate places where they would listen to me and engage me in conversations about how inclusion had touched their lives and how inclusion could lead to peace.

And so I dived down the rabbit hole.

I have been deeply engaged in many, many conversations since Aaron and I joined the cruise. I have come to understand that the nature of the other side of the rabbit hole is that it is a closed, complete world in itself and that typically no one enters or leaves it. For most people there is no reason to shift “worlds”, and there are strong, if invisible, structures in place that make shifting worlds difficult and possibly dangerous.

“Disability” and “inclusion” are like two mutually exclusive worlds. Inclusion itself is about bridging from one world to others. My disorientation is a natural consequence of entering, in a fully participatory way, into a completely unfamiliar world. My loss of funding for personal assistance is a natural consequence of leaving the world of concepts and structures to which it is firmly attached.

I have also realized that personal assistance itself is currently attached to the world of disability and that it can be redefined as a bridge that creates a way for people to move with support from one world of participation to another.

Along the way the Tour has been given a magnificent gift of $10,000. I have learned so much about how important inclusion is to others and how valuable people consider my work.

I am looking forward to a prosperous and effective 2009 indeed!

Judith

Friday, January 2, 2009

Last Entry of 2008

I am in San Juan, Puerto Rico, writing in a hotel room, what I expect will be my last blog entry of 2008. Gabor is somewhere in the Keys and I am with Aaron Richmond who has been my Year End Cruise personal assistant for four years now.

Many people have been generous in giving money for the World Peace through Inclusion Tour since October. I want to be quick to write that the cruise was paid for before I left on the Tour. Your fund raised dollars are not supporting my participation in a Landmark Education course on a Caribbean cruise.

Personal assistance has become very much of a subtext of the Tour. I define personal assistance as a relationship between two individuals where one is willingly and intentionally using their bodily, emotional and mindful capacities to support another to fulfill their intentions. In general personal assistants provide support in the areas of mobility, bodily well being, communication and a very difficult to define area I might call guidance. In the area of guidance the assistant takes part in structuring the environment so that the supported individual can best use their own abilities and be best received by others. I have written an article about personal assistance which is available for free at www.ancilla.tv.

Their have been several challenges to my personal assistance since mid-October when Gabor, Erin and I formally launched this Tour. Not the least has been the breakdown in the financing that pays Gabor’s and other’s wages. It is nothing short of miraculous that Gabor has stepped into supporting me facing the uncertainty of when and where the money will emerge to pay him. His capacity to sustain willingness is even more enormous than his physical strength, upon which I also rely continuously!

This other side of the rabbit hole is marked by how much more obvious is my own responsibility to sustain the relationship through which I receive the support that sustains me and creates my capacity to accomplish my intentions. More than ever I must take an active interest in ensuring that Gabor, and now Aaron, and others who come and go, understand and have enough agreement with my intentions and strategies in order not to feel either confused, abused or abandoned and that their needs and concerns are heard and addressed.

My current fatigue on the matter is not that there is a problem either with Aaron or Gabor, but that the last week of finishing up Christmas related activities and getting ready to come to Fort Lauderdale, meet up with Gabor, and fly to San Juan, Puerto Rico to pick up the Year End Cruise have been complicated by the sudden illness of another assistant who had come from Canada to relieve Gabor. Between her inability to work and her own need for our support we have been using all the capacity we have. This of course is not the problem – the worry is that we are so close to breakdown in my support relationships that it has become difficult to decide what to do, what not to do and which problem to solve next. If I cannot reliably set the context, direction and provide the resources to sustain the structure of my support, my personal assistants lose a considerable part of the stability they need to support me well. The dynamic dance breaks down.

As it happens we made Fort Lauderdale and Puerto Rico and no further hitches were encountered. May the course “Simple Pleasures” and the cruise itself bring me some insight on ensuring that the stresses of the last few months are firmly behind us.

Judith